You only truly realize the direction your life is taking when your family, through tears, waves goodbye
behind the airport’s security glass—and at a certain moment, they disappear. When you are seated on the
plane you dreamed of for so many months, knowing that this moment would come sooner or later. You
lived inside the fantasy for so long that it feels strange for it to finally become real.
Now it is time to unknow everything: the mannerisms of your homeland, the familiar streets, the ease of
going to the fruit shop to buy a handful of grapes—these will become your greatest daily challenges. You
will think everything is strange; however, you are the stranger in this place. You are not the protagonist in
this new land that has carried centuries of history on its back without you.
I came to the Baltic because chance willed it so. I lived for years inside the memories of someone who had
been here before. I lived in dreams of ice and fog while I still walked through my southern city, with the
rubber of my soles melting from the heat. One likes to believe they do not miss their homeland; yet I found
myself in my room in Narva, the heater at full power, sweating, just to feel a trace of that distant,
scorching discomfort of Granada.
In Narva, you will not manage to distract yourself from who you are; rather, you will crash headfirst into your own reflection, confronted with the scarce external stimulation. It is a place of reflection, calm, subtlety. A crane flying above your head as you look to the other side of the river, toward the forbidden land, will let you know it is time to inhabit a new version of yourself. You will meet people with whom you will stay in touch for a while; others you will never see again in your life; and others, if you are very lucky, may accompany you until the end. Few will inhabit your present, but in the invisible distance you will always remain part of that exotic memory the Baltic represented for them. I invite you to unknow as much as possible in a lifetime. There is no worse sign than believing we know too much when we are still so tender, so young.
